Friday, April 10, 2009

Better Homes And Gardens NOT

Last night before bed I was reading the new issue of Better Homes and Gardens. Inside was a story about a young couple and their three perfect little blond headed girls and how they had decorated their home.

The wife, Ashley, was quoted as saying "There's really nothing here that the kids could destroy."

This sent me off on a laughing spree. You just don't have the right kind of kids, Ashley. Let me tell you what 9 mentally disabled kids can do with your home.

How about those three pretty round metal legged glass table you use in place of a coffee table? My kids would break the glass in a day, and then one or two of them would pick them up and throw them just for fun.

How about the white slipcovers on your sofa and loveseat? In my house we'd have a LOT of trouble just keeping them ON the furniture, and anyway, I'd have to remove them at least twice a week to wash them. Not worth the effort. Better to have dark leather furniture that doesn't show dirt.

And what's with those wicker and rattan dining room chairs? In a large adoptive family they wouldn't have a chance! Someone would pick at them until a big hole resulted, and then they'd move on to the next chair. That's why we have cheap metal dining room chairs (And yet they get broken, as when knocked over the wood seats get knocked off.)

And Ashley, those pretty ceramic pieces with greenery in them on the mantel? Come on. No way. And you pretty antique looking persian area rug on top of you larger sisal carpet...I have a kid who would find a thread in that Persian thing and keep at it until the whole rug was threadbare. And natural fiber in a carpet? That surely wouldn't stand up to spills.

Those two huge upside down glass encased candle chandeliers? I groan at the thought of cleaning that glass up after a month here. Then I look at the walls, not one hole, not one broken window waiting for the money to get it repaired.

And yet, I wouldn't trade my unstylishly unfurnished and constanly in need of repair home with Ashley's for a mint of money. Because my home has something hers doesn't. MY KIDS!

1 comment:

Flush said...

LOL!!!Sounds like my house. I just rolled laughing when you said rattan furniture. I think it might last a week here, tops.