Lately we've been hearing a resurgence of the old saying, "It is what it is." Now lots of people would say this is a doom and gloom type of saying, but I don't think that's so.
Say you have a nasty situation at home. If you say, and internalize, "it is what it is" it CAN be an incredibly freeing thing.
Freeing? You bet. IIWII (It is what it is) tell us that nothing is going to change it. In other words, no amount of angst on your part is going to have any effect. So why bother?
Simply stop the worrying about something that has happened. Stop the blaming. Stop the anger. None of that is going to change the situation. It isn't worth the effort.
Instead, think IIWII and think of how to improve the situation. And of it simply can't be improved or eliminated, than accept it. Without all the negative emotion.
Now that can be incredibly freeing.
I started doing this a few years ago. Now when someone breaks a window I just think it is what it is and send my husband out to get a new one. My being angry isn't going to restore that window. And, in truth, my being angry isn't even going to change the kid who probably did it (There are two probabilities in this family.)
I simply stay happy.
DH's response to things like this is to blow a gasket. Not me. IIWII. Don't waste the energy! Get on with it. Just do what has to be done and forget the angst.
You have no idea how freeing this can be. Try it.